It's Been A Long Time...

...since I loved anything as much as I love my new job at The Foundation. I've tried unsuccessfully to play it cool and be circumspect, now I have to come out with it!! It's completely wonderful - the women in the office are compassionate and supportive and interesting, the work I will be doing is varied and has purpose, and the office is located in a beautiful riverside suburb. These people think I am sent from heaven - my skills are exactly what they need for the position, and so far my disposition seems to fit with them also. Phew. While I have not yet exhaled, I'm letting my breath out (and my guard down) a little bit more each day.

One of the many things I love, and want to rave about, it the fact that the whole office (between 10 and 15 staff depending on the day) sits together and has lunch. I've never experienced that before...and they talk about all kinds of random things, not just work. The psychologists, execs and office staff sit together and chat. It's weird. But nice weird. People listen to my ideas, and ask questions, and my boss M has said a number of times that she knows it will take me a couple of months to find my feet and feel confident in the job. A COUPLE OF MONTHS!! Not three days! Hooray.

It would seem that the best thing that could have happened to me this year is leaving my last job (both the one where I had my breakdown and the one I got sacked from). Because if ever a place was meant to be MY workplace, it's this. The last couple of days have shown me how miserable I've been at work for a long time. Which is undoubtedly why I indulged my hyperattachment BPD side and spent hours formulating and acting on crushes. I was bored, unappreciated, lonely and goal-less. Every day, now, I do things that help The Foundation to help kids (and adults) to read. It's the opposite of where I was 6 months ago.

I am supposed to be off tomorrow but am going into the office for a few hours for training. My work days will usually be Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday, which will give me time to catch up on my online world and also see Dr A, etc. The Good Doc is in America for 2 weeks at a Psychiatric Conference, which is the longest I've been without seeing him since February. Thankfully, things seem to be ticking along nicely. He has backup staff in the practice while he's away but I'd rather not have to start over with someone.

There are two main drawbacks with my new job. One is the travelling (1 - 1.5 hours each way on three buses). The other is the financial aspect. Not only am I reduced to part-time hours, but the hourly wage is considerably less than my last job (because it's a charity). I really don't care, as long as I can survive - which I will once I cancel my private health insurance (which has given me nothing except cheaper dental anyway) and my gym membership. Some other stuff might have to go. But it's worth it for a sense of purpose and satisfaction. The travelling will be tiring, but I was travelling almost as much for my last job (and that was 5 days a week).

The post is incredibly dull, I'm sorry - I mainly just wanted to update y'all on the situation. I promise I will make more of an effort soon! To my lovely friends who are struggling just now -- I hope that there are brighter times ahead for you xxx